Tuesday, January 27, 2009

The overwhelming needs

I'm not even going to attempt to catch up what has happened between now and my last blog. I will give a quick overview of my hearts journey over break. Something snapped into place spiritually. It was like when at the eye doctors they switch between lenses and all of a sudden you can read the bottom row. I became acutely aware of my need for a savior, of my need for Jesus, and not only my need but everyone around me desperately needing Him as well. I hadn't even realized the subtle ways I begin to think people are ok without Jesus or ok with a watered down "just be a nice person" "God helps those who help themselves" "all paths lead to God" kind of Christianity, I mean its better than nothing right? But for a week I had my eyes opened to how nothing but Jesus and surrender to Him and acceptance of His sacrifice and His plan will lead to life. Nothing else leads to life and wholeness, and all around us are the suffering, the broken and the dying. And they don't know it, and most of the time we don't either. I thought of my students and how I see them transformed before me as they choose to follow Jesus. That at each point they choose His will they grow stronger, braver, and more joyful. I felt my call to be an InterVarsity staffwork strongly affirmed. Right after this week of intense awareness I became incredibly discouraged about the support raising side of my calling. Even if I love the campus and desire for more students to follow Jesus that won't happen without me having hours to build the ministry on campus. Though I am surrounded by the incredible generosity of so many believers I am still about 30, 000 dollars short of a full time budget. This is an amount impossible for me to raise. Which reminds me that this is a work of God and not about my abilities or connections. Through much prayer and encouragement from other staff around me I am beginning to have hope that I will have the suppourt I need to continue on as a staff worker at Auraria. Already this semester God has been moving to bring students to himself and I am so excited and blessed to be part of that.